Sunday, December 30, 2012

Cheap Vodka Filtered into Top Shelf Vodka (and then infused, yumm)

Not bad for $2.50 of vodka and a recycled bottle! 

       Well, New Years eve is tomorrow and I realized that as a guest as a party I should make a gift for the host and also make something for myself to get hammered off of.  As I am currently chilling at my parents for the holidays I didn't want them to think I was a total heathen so, I decided to make some swanky $10 handle vodka.

       The problem: Cheap vodka tastes like the devil's asshole.
       Stoner Solution: Send that shit through a Britta Filter 6 times! (Why 6? Well that's when it really can't be improved anymore, apparently)
Note the plastic bottle.


1) Pour your handle of Nikolai, Popov, Gordon's, Mr. Boston, Zenka, etc. into your Britta filter.
2) Let it all filter though.  This'll take a while but it's worth it.
3) Using a funnel pour it all back into your plastic handle.
4) Repeat steps 1-3 five more times.  I wrote a little sticky note with the times I re-filtered so I wouldn't forget how many times I'd done it.

Fancy Ass Filtered Clementine Vodka

1) Peel 3 clementines and chop them into small slices
2) Shove the clementines down the neck of a fancy looking bottle.  This green one cost me $2 at HomeGoods.
3) Take your $10 Grey Goose A La Britta and pour it into your fancy ass bottle.
4) Shake it around and let it sit for a while (like over night) or forever.  The vodka will keep the fruit from rotting (alcohol kills germs!). The longer it sits the stronger the clementine flavor will taste.
5) Look like you aren't a broke ass homie when you show up to a party with sweet, sweet, clementine vodka.

One Handle should make 4 of these 750ml bottles or you could, you know, just drank it.

Monday, December 10, 2012

Stoney Tuna Burgers

I was sitting with E-Money the other day and he told me he had like 40 cans of tuna he needed to get rid of.  Challenge Accepted.

420 No Money Tuna Burgers!
6 cans of Tuna
1/2 Cup Italian Bread Crumbs
3 tbs Mayo
2tbs Butter

Don't forget to preheat the oven to Broil!

1. Get your shit together!
2. Mix your shit together!
3. Taste test! You might want to add a bit more bread crumbs.
4. Ball these babies into 8 patties on a greased cookie tray.
5. Broil for 5-6 minutes.

I liked them with some thousand island dressing, cheese, and a bulkie roll but they were good nekkid with a side of mixed vegetables, too.